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Dealing with Life after Loss

by Kendall VanBlarcom

When you are trying to cope, dealing with life after loss, it can be very, very difficult. When we lose someone close to us, particularly if it is a family member or a lifelong friend, the grief can be an exceptionally powerful force in our day-to-day lives.

While we can logically understand that loss is part of life, when we lose someone close, it can cause confusion, sadness, and depression. How each person copes with grief can differ, but typically time passing is what helps. But that time period may be months or even a year. There is no set time on how long the grieving process takes.

Accept that it will take time. While a supportive environment and taking care of yourself can help, you will need to adjust to the idea of the loss before you are able to accept your current situation and move forward. Talking to a counselor or other mental health professional can help.

Asking for Help When Dealing with Life After Loss

If you feel your grief is consuming you, know you are not alone. Many dealing with life after loss describe their sadness overtaking their whole lives, including their thoughts and emotions. Understand your feelings are adjusting, making sense of something that seemed impossible before.

Talking through your emotions can help. You don’t need to go through this alone. If a friend wants to bring over dinner and visit, try to take them up on it. If you are unable to talk with those closest to you, consider seeking professional help.

Be Present As You Heal

Living in the past and continually replaying memories in your mind can cause intense sadness. Particularly if you are worried about the future, too. Learn to live in the moment. Focus on the present.

To live your best each day, take care of yourself. Remember to eat well, get exercise, and stay on a consistent sleep schedule. Solid, healthy patterns are important. You may be tempted to dull your feelings with alcohol or other substances, but this will not help you heal. Turning off your emotions can even lead to it taking even longer for you to feel better again.

Get the help you need and recognize that your grief is yours. While it may be helpful to hear about or read about stages of grief or timelines of grief, know that you will move forward on your own path to healing.

You may be in the process of becoming a completely different person. Or, you are settling in to be happy as the person you’ve always known yourself to be. Either way, change can be very upsetting and you may resist it, but change can also be growth. When you are dealing with life after loss, be kind to yourself, and eventually, you will feel strong again.

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