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Senior Woman Sitting On Sofa At Home Suffering From Depression
Healthy Living

You Can Turn Mind Chatter Off Whenever You Choose

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

When life is fun and you’re laughing away, you’re probably not judging people or situations in a negative or harmful way, right? That’s because you haven’t allowed your mind chatter to occupy any time or space in your thoughts. But what about those days that don’t feel so fun and you’re frowning or crying at every little thing?

How do you handle your days or moments when you can’t seem to turn your negative mind chatter off? Maybe you rationalize that everyone has conversations going on in their heads. Certainly, you can’t be the only one on the planet? Personal consulting can help.

What is Mind Chatter Anyway?

Maybe you’re wondering what mind chatter is and how consultants and life coaches can help you turn off “the noise” or as some people refer to it, “the voice that doesn’t go away.” Mind chatter most frequently occurs in men and women who are anxious or are going through a depressed feeling as a result of some unpleasant life experience or a negative outlook.

Evidence of Mind Chatter

The easiest way to tell if you are experiencing mind chatter is you will catch yourself judging, predicting outcomes, and having irrational thoughts and dialogues with yourself that are not positive. In fact, mind chatter accuses, lies, twists the circumstances, and makes everything look dark and ugly, as if there’s no way out.

Dialogue in Your Head

Mind chatter takes many avenues of negative speech in your head, depending on your circumstances. It’s almost as if someone has a concealed video camera inside your head, and then once a statement is spoken, your mind responds by listening to the lies that your mind’s messages are trying to convince you are real. Here’s a shortlist, just so you get the idea:

  • Going to the store today would be a waste of makeup and hair products; I think I’ll just stay home.
  • I can’t go to that event tonight. I’ve gained too much weight, and I have nothing to wear that can conceal my huge belly.
  • I don’t deserve to have fun tonight at that celebration party, so I’ll just go to a movie by myself in case anyone wonders why I’m not there.
  • I don’t do well in crowds, and I know hundreds of people will be there tonight.
  • I’m just not good enough or smart enough to hang with those people at the convention today.

 

The examples above reveal mind chatter—negative reasons why you can’t, won’t, or refuse to do something.

Three Quick Solutions for Getting Rid of Mind Chatter

Certainly it’s up to you and someone you consult with to help you transition into an everyday state of mind that doesn’t criticize and condemn everything, including yourself. But until you can get time to work with someone, here are three quick solutions that can help you overcome mind chatter.

1. Play your most favorite music, close your eyes, and then sing along or dance to the music.

2. Sit in a comfortable chair or lie down on your bed. Then close your eyes and breathe really deep, exhaling with force and concentrating on your breathing. Breathe in through your nose and breathe out through your mouth. Do this 10-15 times and think only about your breathing.

3. Verbally create a list of things that you’re grateful for today. Make your own rule that says you can’t repeat the same gratitude. See how many gratuities you can come up with during that one relaxation session.

When mind chatter begins eroding your positive train of thought, turn the moment around with one of the three solutions you’ve just learned; before you know it, you’ll feel better and your mind chatter will have been removed.

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Supporting wife
Healthy Living

Feeling Overwhelmed? Here are Three Solutions You Can Use Today

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Whether you’re single, divorced, or married, many feel overwhelmed. Everyone has good days and bad days. Sometimes you want to write down your gratitudes because you’re so filled with joy. But at other times, it would be difficult in your own frame of mind to even conjure up three reasons why you are grateful to crawl out of bed in the morning.

If you need a helping hand, reserve a personal consulting session to explore ways to eliminate your frustrations.

Are You Feeling Overwhelmed?

Maybe you’re living in a state of chaos because there’s so much going on in your life. Or maybe you’re just feeling totally depleted. If one more person gets in your face and asks you to do something, well… it makes you want to scream, “No! No! No! I can’t take on anything more!”

As humans, we have many choices about how to achieve a solution, especially when we’re feeling overwhelmed. But today, you will discover three solutions that you can apply to your life immediately, and that you can use over and over again whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed. Let’s get started.

Actions to Help

1. Among the many demands on your time, focus on two priorities that you would like to accomplish today. Don’t feel guilty about your big laundry list of things to do. Just choose two things. If you’re in a revenue-based situation, then choose the top two jobs that will create income right away.

2. Change up the way that you start your day. Everyone has their own routine. But, what if you didn’t do things today the same way that you have always done them? Would that change your outlook and attitude? Choose one thing, alter it, and then move forward.

For example, maybe when you get up in the morning, you have a light breakfast, make your coffee and drink it. Or if you’re a parent, perhaps you put out the breakfast for your children or maybe you select the clothes that they will wear that day. Change it up! Go outside and do 20 jumping jacks. Or, sit on the floor, close your eyes, picture a favorite place that you would like to be in, and sing your favorite song. Yes, it might sound silly, but no one’s watching. Give yourself permission for 15 minutes to do whatever you want to do. It’s guaranteed to totally change your outlook and attitude.

3. Asking for what you want or asking for help is sometimes the most difficult thing for people to do. But I challenge you: Ask for help! When we reach out to another human being and ask for help, of course, they can say yes, or they can say no. But the true value in this life exercise is that you don’t have to do everything by yourself. Keep asking until you find someone who is willing to help you.

You Don’t Have to Feel Overwhelmed

Feeling overwhelmed is not an emotion that is uniquely yours. You might think that it is, but if you were to ask friends, family, or total strangers, the majority of them, if they are honest, would admit that they are overwhelmed, too.

You don’t have to feel overwhelmed. If you look at the boundaries that you have set and established in your life (you have done that, haven’t you?), and you feel good about the fact that you are doing the very best that you can do, then there’s no more reasons for feeling overwhelmed.

How do you manage your life when you’re feeling overwhelmed? Tell me your story. I’m sure it will help other people who are feeling overwhelmed.

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Aging

Signs of Anger Issues

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

If you are experienced as a caregiver for older adults, it is possible you have seen signs of anger issues. For some, anger outburst happen because a senior citizen is feeling vulnerable, which can magnify emotions and reactions. In separate cases, anger occurs in response to other problems, whether that is illness, pain, or memory loss.

When you see signs of anger issues in an individual you are caring for—whether those indicators are physical abuse, verbal abuse or periods of paranoia—talk through your experiences with a professional to find relief.

Coping with Physical and Verbal Abuse

If you are caring for someone who has an illness that is causing diminished cognitive skills, sometimes the medical issue causes personality changes. It is important to not blame yourself for an illness you cannot control. Be sure to take the steps you need to take care of yourself.

One first step may be to get a clear diagnosis of what is happening with your loved one. With a complete evaluation, you and your loved one’s healthcare provider may be able to land on the root of their personality change. With this knowledge, you can take the next steps needed to secure a healthy home.

In addition to making health and checkups a priority for the one you are caring for, be sure to take care of your own physical and mental health as well. Stay healthy with a proper diet, exercise, sleep, and socializing. Talk through any problems you are having so any negative thoughts can be released and address it when you are experiencing anger from a loved one.

Paranoid Behavior

Among the signs of anger issues is when an individual you are caring for accuses you of intending to harm them. It is important you bring this up, and any other examples of paranoia or hallucinations, with a doctor. This behavior could be the result of Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, or another serious issue in need of attention. Possibly a shift in medications can help. Getting professional help is typically the right place to start as trying to convince someone that their thoughts are unreal may only increase their anger.

Everyone has good days and bad days, but no one should suffer abuse. If you see signs of anger issues in an older loved one or in a senior citizen you are caring for, reach out for help and support. It may take some time and persistence, but communication within families and among professionals can lead to solutions.

As a caregiver, you need to take care of yourself. After all, if you aren’t healthy you are not able to take care of anyone else. Deal with any negative aspects of your life. It is important to learn how to take care of the caregiver, too. Change is inevitable and it is impossible to turn back time, but there are ways to adapt to changes. Work toward a stress-free household. Utilize the support available to maintain a healthy environment, for yourself and your loved ones.

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