It’s truly amazing to me that the physical intimacy and loving sex we need to stay healthy as we age is in such short supply when it is so readily available to all of us.
I’m referring to touch and sexual intimacy, innate behaviors that are hard-wired into us humans. These are not just for the lucky few—the young, the healthy, and the beautiful. These are life-sustaining behaviors given to each one of us at birth.
It is our birthright to touch and be touched, to love and be loved, and they are just as essential for our survival when we are older as when we were young.
Yet the reality is that older folks are touched less than at any other time in their lives. As time passes, partners die and children move away, taking the cuddly grandchildren with them. In our touch phobic society where touch is limited to only close family members, elders become increasingly isolated and deprived of the physical intimacy they need to thrive in old age.
Science agrees
It may be that seniors need more loving touch and sexual intimacy to stay healthy as they age.
This is not just my opinion—this is science talking. Research is showing that loving relationships, sexual intercourse, and orgasms are not only pleasurable but are beneficial to our health, especially as we age.
Research is pointing to the fact that the more sex you have as you age, the healthier you will be and the longer you will live.
Loving sex can provide the antidote for many health challenges endemic to old age.
For example, it is now known that loving sex:
- Lowers blood pressure,
- Reduces depression, especially in women,
- Strengthens the immune system to fight colds and flu,
- Eliminates loneliness, slowing rate of physical decline,
- Improves sleep
- Increases happiness and overall well-being.
A prescription for loving sex
For these reasons, I believe we should add touch and loving sex to the list of healthy lifestyle choices for seniors. For example, healthy seniors would include the following in their health plan: weight training, aerobic exercise, supplements, active social involvement, stress management, blueberries, salmon, and avocados, touch and loving sex.
I’m not joking. Give it a year or two and you’ll see scientific articles supporting this wisdom. I believe we will eventually come to understand that love and intimacy are the underlying determinants of physical and emotional health at all ages. . . and that they are major factors contributing to our good health and longevity as we age.
No age limit on sex
Nothing physical stands in the way of us enjoying touch and sexual intimacy well into our 90s. There is no age limit on our desire to be touched, sexual longing, or even the ability to orgasm. What robs us of these sensual pleasures are our own limiting beliefs about sex and aging, cultural taboos and misinformation that lead us to deny that old folks are sexual beings.
Learn all about senior sex
In following blogs, I will be offering information and workshops about the surprisingly erotic world of mature sex. I will be interviewing sex health experts and folks over 60 who are having great sex and are happier than they ever expected to be at this time in their lives.
I invite you to read my blog if you want more loving sex in your life as you age. Or if you are just curious what senior sex is all about, tune into my upcoming radio show where I’ll be discussing the challenges and benefits of sex as we age.
I look forward to embarking on this journey with you and sharing the secret wisdom that enables us to be happily sexy at this time in our lives. I wish that for you too!
-Dr. Victoria Bentley is a senior citizen and clinical psychologist who lives near San Francisco. She has been following her heart and exploring the world of senior sex for some years. In her writings, she shares the extraordinary opportunity seniors have for loving sex, sensuality, and intimate connection in their lives.
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