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Senior woman standing alone at home
Healthy Living

How Online Support Can Help with Social Distancing

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Social distancing is when individuals maintain an increased physical distance from one another. It is used to help communities minimize contagious diseases by reducing the possibility of infection. This is important to our physical health.

The problem is maintaining one’s mental health while social distancing. Humans are social animals, so it feels unnatural to stay away from others. It can underscore feelings of loneliness.

Reach out for personal online support if you feel a lack of social connections is impacting your wellbeing.

Ways People Feel When Isolated

People are unique and they can have different emotional responses to social distancing. But, we are all human. There are common themes connecting how people feel during difficult times. Talking through these emotions with a professional can help to alleviate some of the emotional strain.

  • Anxiety. There can be a lot of fear around a situation that prompts social distancing. If an individual is worried about their health, and the health of loved ones and others in their community, it is natural for a person to have feelings of anxiousness or fear. The situation itself can create anxiety and then, too often, individuals find they have nobody to talk over their fears with.
  • Anger. When people feel a lack of control in their lives, it can lead to frustration and anger. These feelings can bubble up within a person. Then, they may find themselves lashing out at others, family members who call or a stranger at the grocery store. There are healthy ways to cope with irritability. Erupting at others can result in further isolation.
  • Depression. Daily routines can help people who suffer from depression. In many instances, social distancing disrupts those routines. For instance, if someone finds joy from regular breakfast outings with friends, they might find that as they stay home dark feelings grow. Shedding light on these feelings with online support can be helpful.

How to Cope with Social Distancing

Recognize you are not alone, many feel unsettled by social distancing. Once you acknowledge the problem you can seek solutions, from phone calls to online chats.

When you connect with an online counselor, you can find healing through conversation. They can also help you discover ways to improve your life throughout a period of social distance. Suggestions could including breathing exercises or activities such as keeping a gratitude journal or fostering a hobby to boost your mood.

Be kind to yourself and others. Recognize things that are exacerbating any personal stresses. For example, managing the amount of news you watch or read can be helpful. Yes, it can be beneficial to stay informed, but obsessively loading news websites or watching television news channels continually can lead to fearful feelings.

Some people are more prone to having problems with social distancing. This could include individuals who have experienced past trauma or people who have had issues with loneliness in their past.

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Cheerful seniors exercising on mats at park
Healthy Living

How to Increase Your Self-Motivation

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Motivation occurs under many circumstances, but when you experience natural inspiration as a result of energy from your spirit, that’s when you’ll feel exuberant and eager to willingly devote time to your interests. Self-motivation helps when you’re trying to lose weight, become more invested in a goal for your future, quit an addiction, or even something as simple as getting your chores done.

Boost Your Positive Thinking

When you’re driven by daily goals and routines, motivation can be challenging if it doesn’t come naturally. You need a positive mental outlook. Train yourself to avoid negative thinking. Also, create a list of reasons to pursue your goal.

Did you know that internal self-motivation is best developed in environments where external motivation is decreased? It’s one thing to motivate when someone else is cracking the whip and asking you to perform. It’s another thing to be internally motivated. Then, you are totally in charge of the outcome.

When I need to motivate myself to do something, it’s almost impossible when I am procrastinating or filling my time with long phone conversations or watching movies. Let’s take a look at a couple of hypothetical goals so that you can see how positive or negative self-motivation can assist you in achieving your objectives.

Suggestions for Improving Your Self-Motivation

An important aspect of self-motivation is allowing yourself to dream about your goal. At the beginning of any goal, motivation tends to feel painless. In fact, inspiration often strikes when you decide to do something positive toward reaching your goal. For example, I have always wanted to put a daily routine in place that would allow me to walk for fifteen minutes. That’s all…just fifteen minutes. It doesn’t sound that difficult, does it?

On the first day, I arose thirty minutes earlier than normal. The sun was just beginning to show on the horizon, and there I was, out the door wearing my sweats and a new pair of walking shoes.

On the second day, I was looking forward to my new routine, but about five minutes into my walk, it started raining. I turned around and ran home. I was disgusted and drenched, but content that my self-motivation was still intact. It was then that I decided to come up with an alternate plan in case rain threatened to sabotage my walking goals.

One key factor for increasing your self-motivation is focusing on the now. So, when a challenge meets you face to face, you won’t dwell on the past. You can come up with an alternate plan that will keep you on course. For me, that meant exercising in my home on rainy days. This keeps my daily activity goal intact.

Certainly, there are hundreds of ways to motivate yourself, and each method depends on the goal you’re going after, talking through your goals can help you pave the path to motivation.

 

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Helping hands or begging for help
Healthy Living

Forgive Yourself

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Although there may be things in your past you wish you could change, it is important for your own health to forgive yourself. Accept that you cannot change the past. Lingering on memories and feelings of the past that are unpleasant will only create more bad feelings. Why? Because dwelling on the past can actually make you feel more depressed.

Here are a handful of ways to start letting go of the past.

Talk About Your Problems

When you talk about past problems, it’s easier to remember where long-ago issues reside—in the past. When you talk through things that have happened with a counselor, you can begin to alleviate some of the anger or shame associated with the past event.

Working with a professional can help you to let go of the past and learn how to move forward. A therapist can assist you in learning to feel positive emotions about yourself and the situation you currently live in. If past events make you anxious, seek help to forgive yourself and move forward with your life.

Write and Forgive Yourself

Much like talk therapy, writing through your emotions can be a useful way to let go of toxic emotions. When you write about the past, things that happened and how it made you feel, you can see why the event caused you pain and who you may have hurt in the process, intentionally or unintentionally.

Also, you can write down an alternative version of events if that is helpful. You can write down how you would do it now, if you had an opportunity to go back and do it over. Therefore, you can clarify your own morals and values. This process can remind us of what we have learned, how much we have grown.

In addition to journaling, some find it healing to write down events you seek forgiveness for and then burn the paper it is written on. This symbolic gesture is a physical way of getting your emotions out—onto the page—and watching them dissipate. After the page is destroyed, decide to leave the event in the past. If your memory brings it up again, remind yourself to let the thought pass, that you have already forgiven yourself.

Meditate to Forgive Yourself

When you meditate, you can clear your mind of regrets and old hurts, making way for joy and peace. Meditation and mindfulness help to create a healthy life at any age, which is why regular meditation for seniors is so important.

Also, if you choose to, you can use imagery while you meditate to help you forgive yourself. Take deep breaths, calm yourself. Imagine past wrongs in a bubble and watch them float away from you. Let the painful event leave or dissipate from your mind.

Practice Self-Love

Another essential element is learning to love yourself. Through self-love you can forgive yourself, resulting in higher self-esteem. Make yourself a priority. Prioritize time with loving and supportive people. And, if you need help, reach out to begin counseling.

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Senior woman
Healthy Living

5 Ways to Start a Gratitude Practice

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Practicing gratitude can decrease stress, increase optimism, and improve your well-being. This is because negative thoughts can be very draining. So, changing your outlook and focusing on the positives in your life can help pave your path to healing.

If you need help finding thankfulness in your life, reach out for counseling. Talking about your problems, and recognizing the good you already have in your life, can lead to more happiness and fulfillment while reducing stress and depression.

Below are a handful of gratitude exercises, pick one or two and incorporate them into your daily routine.

Compliment Yourself

Recognize something positive about yourself and give yourself praise. Too often, people put themselves down for past mistakes. Forgive yourself and recognize all of the good you have in your life now. For example, you could tell yourself you are thankful for your patience in dealing with difficult circumstances. Or, you could state that you are grateful for your ability to organize your home efficiently.

Share a Compliment

Just as people get in the habit of noticing their own faults, it’s common for individuals to be quick to complain about the people close to them, too. Take a moment to consider the things you appreciate about individuals in your life. Express gratitude to a friend, partner, or child. Choose something you specifically enjoy about the person and share that with them. If your child is a good parent, tell them. If you appreciate the meals your partner prepares, let them know you appreciate their cooking skills.

Remind Yourself

To establish a new routine of gratitude, you’ll need to enforce the new behavior. Place a note on your refrigerator reminding you to practice gratitude. Or, if you are often on a laptop or phone, set an alarm for a daily moment of gratitude. Consistently acknowledging the positive will eventually come naturally.

Make a Gratitude Jar

Find an empty, clean jar and place it somewhere you’ll see it twice day. Ideally, in the morning and at night. Possible ideas include placing the jar next to your bed or near your toothbrush. When you are near the jar or bowl, take a moment to think of something you are thankful for and add a coin or two, acknowledging your blessings. Then, once the container is filled, share your gratitude by giving the money away, as a donation or a gift.

Or, write down something you are thankful for each day and add the slip of paper to your gratitude jar instead. Then, if a time comes when you are feeling stressed or anxious, calm yourself by opening the jar and reading through your notes.

How to Feel Grateful During Stressful Times

While expressing gratitude during difficult times can be taxing, it is still important. You can acknowledge things are difficult now, and honor your feelings, while still finding aspects of life to appreciate. After all, research shows that grateful people report lower levels of depression and stress, even when life is demanding and hard to understand.

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Supporting wife
Healthy Living

Feeling Overwhelmed? Here are Three Solutions You Can Use Today

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Whether you’re single, divorced, or married, many feel overwhelmed. Everyone has good days and bad days. Sometimes you want to write down your gratitudes because you’re so filled with joy. But at other times, it would be difficult in your own frame of mind to even conjure up three reasons why you are grateful to crawl out of bed in the morning.

If you need a helping hand, reserve a personal consulting session to explore ways to eliminate your frustrations.

Are You Feeling Overwhelmed?

Maybe you’re living in a state of chaos because there’s so much going on in your life. Or maybe you’re just feeling totally depleted. If one more person gets in your face and asks you to do something, well… it makes you want to scream, “No! No! No! I can’t take on anything more!”

As humans, we have many choices about how to achieve a solution, especially when we’re feeling overwhelmed. But today, you will discover three solutions that you can apply to your life immediately, and that you can use over and over again whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed. Let’s get started.

Actions to Help

1. Among the many demands on your time, focus on two priorities that you would like to accomplish today. Don’t feel guilty about your big laundry list of things to do. Just choose two things. If you’re in a revenue-based situation, then choose the top two jobs that will create income right away.

2. Change up the way that you start your day. Everyone has their own routine. But, what if you didn’t do things today the same way that you have always done them? Would that change your outlook and attitude? Choose one thing, alter it, and then move forward.

For example, maybe when you get up in the morning, you have a light breakfast, make your coffee and drink it. Or if you’re a parent, perhaps you put out the breakfast for your children or maybe you select the clothes that they will wear that day. Change it up! Go outside and do 20 jumping jacks. Or, sit on the floor, close your eyes, picture a favorite place that you would like to be in, and sing your favorite song. Yes, it might sound silly, but no one’s watching. Give yourself permission for 15 minutes to do whatever you want to do. It’s guaranteed to totally change your outlook and attitude.

3. Asking for what you want or asking for help is sometimes the most difficult thing for people to do. But I challenge you: Ask for help! When we reach out to another human being and ask for help, of course, they can say yes, or they can say no. But the true value in this life exercise is that you don’t have to do everything by yourself. Keep asking until you find someone who is willing to help you.

You Don’t Have to Feel Overwhelmed

Feeling overwhelmed is not an emotion that is uniquely yours. You might think that it is, but if you were to ask friends, family, or total strangers, the majority of them, if they are honest, would admit that they are overwhelmed, too.

You don’t have to feel overwhelmed. If you look at the boundaries that you have set and established in your life (you have done that, haven’t you?), and you feel good about the fact that you are doing the very best that you can do, then there’s no more reasons for feeling overwhelmed.

How do you manage your life when you’re feeling overwhelmed? Tell me your story. I’m sure it will help other people who are feeling overwhelmed.

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happy senior woman with eyeglasses
Healthy Living

When Was the Last Time You Had a True Feeling of Joy?

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

Joy can mean many things depending on who you are talking to and how you present the question. But the definition of joy remains the same, it is a feeling of great pleasure and happiness. Do you remember the last time you felt joyful?

What Is a Joy Journal?

Do you keep a joy journal for those times when you experience a true feeling of joy? Most don’t, although keeping a gratitude journal and recording times of happiness can be beneficial for your health. Even if you don’t keep a journal, when you are joyful, you may find the event is recorded in your mind and your memory. You just have to choose whether you want to remember it.

Some would consider that pleasure brings joy, but that’s an individual response, too. Because people have different interests and find pleasure from different situations. But let me ask you this: does joy depend on someone else helping to create that joy for you? Or if you have a favorite pasttime, would it be possible for you to experience that pleasure alone and totally independent of anyone else?

What Is the True Feeling of Joy?

I once heard it said that when a circumstance is bittersweet, it’s the idea that something broken and uncomfortable is happening while something else makes even the darkest nights sparkle with light. If you believe that there is hope in every heartbreak and that to rejoice you must overcome some phenomenal event or sadness, then does that produce joy?

Consider that perhaps joy is a simple happiness. It knows no rules, no boundaries. It just is! But what about expectations? Can they overshadow an otherwise joyful moment, day, evening, or experience?

Joy, you might say, is the most infallible sign of the presence of God and a supernatural and euphoric sensation that’s contagious, if you allow it to be. Now, wait, before you begin to get out your bow and arrows to shoot down this idea, let me ask you this: Have you ever been in public and felt the pull of a strong universal magnet of joy, laughter, or temporary glee that caught you off guard because someone around you was feeling a HUGE measure of joy?

Joy Is Contagious

Let me state that another way. Joy is contagious. Even if you’re angry, sad, depressed, and having the worst day ever…for a fleeting moment, you can witness a scene that rips your heart apart with uncontrolled feelings of love, hope, happiness and tears. It triggered a supernatural sensation inside your heart that, just for a moment, allowed you to forget about yourself, and celebrate in the here and now of someone feeling joy.

So let me ask you again, when was the last time you felt joy, and can you share that moment with me?

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Senior's hands with red rosary
Healthy Living

How Your Faith Can Impact on Your Health?

by Guest Blogger
written by Guest Blogger

Predicting a person’s physical and mental health can be as simple as asking them what they did on the Sabbath. Religion is one of the most important predictors of health. Spiritual practices have been linked to a reduction in blood pressure, a strong immune system, and the elimination of mental illnesses.

Scientific studies have shown that a lack of religion is as unhealthy as smoking a packet of cigarettes a day for forty years. If you want to improve your physical and mental health, you need to start going to church and praying every day. Here are some of the ways faith is good for your health.

1. Faith changes behavior

Religion has many rules that affect one’s behavior. You are not supposed to drink, smoke, or go out with people who do. Faith encourages behavior change. And it greatly reduces the chances of death. Your religion might not encourage you to eat slow, organic, or non-GMO foods. However, it still influences the habits that you form and the actions that you take.

For instance, microfinance based in Cambodia aims at helping people by giving them small loans to start businesses. One of the loan clients was a fisherman who related his discipline to a group of Christians. They helped him stop taking drugs which ended up improving the environment at home and the relationship he had with his wife and children.

Religion not only fixed his life but also helped him become a wealthy man. Through regular exposure, to groups with healthy habits and lifestyles, faith made it possible for him to live a happy and fulfilling life.

2. Faith helps in managing stress

Chronic stress harms the immune system. And this reduces the ability of white blood cells to attack bacteria and viruses in the body. Research studies have shown that religion can relieve stress in several ways. Prayer can reduce blood pressure caused by stress. The stresses and anxieties of modern life encourage the natural body’s response – fight or flight. Prayer and other spiritual activities can eliminate stress response by enhancing relaxation.

Also, religious people tend to think in healthy ways. Faith allows people to have sense of purpose and meaning in life. And this is linked to improved health. Our brains control several important aspects of our bodies. Therefore, how you think affects how your body operates. In similar ways, religion tends to affect people’s health positively by reducing depression. While religious people do suffer from depression and other mental illnesses, faith offers some protection against adverse mental health effects.

3. Faith encourages socialization

Everyone needs friends. And religion offers a lot of friends. In fact, a study found that church membership is one of the best types of social involvement that leads to happiness and life satisfaction. Another study found similar effects from social interactions among people who share the same faith. Adults in Iowa who went to church frequently were 68 percent less likely to die. The bonds you form with other followers will provide you with more than a social calendar. These interactions sustain our health through improved emotional and psychological wellbeing.

4. Helping others enhances life satisfaction

Faith improves health by providing a community of people who are willing to help when things get tough. Religious institutions have built schools, hospitals, and businesses intending to help the poor and needy in society. If you don’t find yourself in the company of doctors and nurses, don’t fear. There are a lot of people around you who are more than willing to help you.

Apart from that, people who contribute a certain percentage of their income to religious institutions are more likely to be happy. A scientific study sought to determine the most effective methods for people suffering from multiple sclerosis. They found that people who were not only receiving help but also providing it were more likely to benefit. Religious people love volunteering and giving money to charity. And this greatly improves their health.

5. Miracles happen

There is no doubt that the creator heals in miraculous ways at times. The majority of Americans believe that praying can heal someone from illnesses or injury. In the same study, most doctors believe in miracles and healings based on faith. Over the years, the truth of religious institutions has been put to the test, and miracles found to be genuine.

One of the best examples is that of the Egyptian monk who reported that no one had been born again as a Christian apart from witnessed proofs, know signs, and recognized miracles which compel them to practice it. In China, ninety percent of converts claimed to be converted due to religious healings.

Conclusion

Caution should be exercised when talking about faith about physical and mental health since it was never intended to be a magical pill. Believing in something greater than you can transform your life and improve your health.

Author Bio:

John Peterson is a journalist and writer at write my thesis, BrillAssignment and college essay papers with 4 years’ experience working in London magazine “Shop&buy”. He is a professional mini-tennis player and he has written a novel “His heart”. You can find him at fb

 

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senior
Healthy Living

Remember to Enjoy Simple Things

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

There are times when life is difficult. And when things are hard, it can be helpful to remind yourself to enjoy the simple things in life. If you feel overwhelmed, with everything on the news or with issues in your personal life, focusing on positives is a way to lift your spirts and reduce feelings of anxiety.

If you are struggling and want to connect with a personal support coach, reach out. With experience helping individuals improve their lives, a coach can share strategies such as reframing your thoughts and focusing on small things that bring you joy.

How You Interpret a Situation

Remembering you are in control of your thoughts can be helpful. For example, instead of focusing on situations that are out of your control, focus your energy and time on positive emotions. Behaviors and actions that can improve your life. This could mean that instead of obsessing about posts you are seeing on social media, making the decision to log off and take a walk in your neighborhood.

Too often, people ruminate over past experiences or get stuck in negative thought patterns. When you cultivate an optimistic style of thinking, you can appreciate the joy of simple things in life. Yes, there may be adversity in one or two areas of your life. But are other areas thriving? Focus on those and move toward happiness.

Simple Things Make Us Happy

Instead of thinking about how you could be living a happy life in the future, appreciate the things that make you happy right now. You can lift your mood by actively pursing activities that spark joy. This could include one or all of the following.

  • Feeling fresh sheets on your bed
  • Smelling homemade food in the kitchen
  • Dancing to your favorite song
  • Listening to the wind or rain outside
  • Talking with a friend
  • Being active and exercising

 

When individuals what to be happy, they can obsess over becoming happy. But chasing happiness can lead to negative feelings. It may seem counterintuitive, but letting go of the pursuit and simply enjoying the now can bring contentment. As Kurt Vonnegut said, “enjoy the little things in life because one day you’ll look back and realize they were the big things.”

When you feel the state of the world or personal issues have you dwelling on negative emotions, make efforts to improve your life and lift your mood. The world is big and joy is abundant. Spending time in nature can be a great reminder of this. When we enjoy big blue skies or calming waters, it can undo our obsessive thoughts about day to day worries. Other strategies include taking a break from technology, meditating, and spending time with the simple things that bring you joy. To learn more about paths to life improvement, talk to a personal coach.

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Dealing with Loneliness
Healthy Living

Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again

by Kendall VanBlarcom
written by Kendall VanBlarcom

It’s not easy getting older. Not only do you have to deal with the aches and pains of this stage of life, but the reality of death is harsh. You may have lost loved ones that were a big part of your life. Losing them may have brought you to your knees in desperation of wanting them to come back. While you may have been able to get back on your feet again, things are not the same. You may have lost the joy in your life. Aging: vFinding Joy in Your Life Again Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again

The Importance of Joy Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again

You can live without joy, but life isn’t what it should be. Joy is something that makes you love life. It makes you want to wake up each morning to see what lies ahead of you. It gives you that appreciation of life that many people take advantage of.
Without joy, you can feel sad, depressed, and empty. You may feel as though you are just going through the motions of each day. There’s no meaning. There’s no motivation to experience life. Finding Joy in Your Life Again
At this point, you may not even want to live life. You may just want to be depressed. There’s an element of comfort in feeling that way because it may seem like it takes too much effort to live life the way it should be lived. However, getting yourself out of this pit of despair can make it much easier for you to get through each day AND give yourself a life worth living again.
All it takes is putting joy back into your life. You can do that by starting the following:

  • Forcing yourself to step outside – doing this will help you because the sun provides vitamin D, which can regulate your mood. When you are in a good mood, you will feel more motivated and open to feeling joy.
  • Engaging with friends – it’s important to connect with friends because they remind you that while you’ve lost loved ones, you still have others around you. Pushing other loved ones away may feel easier to deal with than having them pass away, but the ones in your life now are the ones who help you cope with the others who have had to move on. It’s what they are meant for in everyone’s life. Reach out to them, embrace them, and enjoy having them in your life while you still can. Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again
  • Participating in activities – the body and mind are meant to be active. Allowing your body and mind to do that will help it experience joy again. You may need to start with something small and then increase what you do to allow yourself to become interested again.
  • Taking care of yourself – taking care of your basic needs and then doing things that make yourself look and feel good are all important. Getting into a self-care routine is a good idea. This may mean getting up, showering/bathing, fixing your hair/shaving, and putting on something you feel pretty/handsome in will make a difference. It will make you feel alive. Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again

Doing these things can feel close to impossible, but they are not. Do a little each day and increase it as you feel that you can. Many of my clients enjoy telling me about what they are thinking and feeling because it helps them cope and be able to do the things mentioned in this blog post. With regular sessions, clients are able to come up with ways to bring the joy back into their life. They are happy to report them and thankful they have a personal confidant that can guide them through some of the tough parts of this stage of life. Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again
The senior years are hard, but you’ve been through difficult times in your life. You’ve overcome those challenges, and you can do the same now. Contact me for help. We all need help from time to time, and it would be a pleasure to be able to be your rock. Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again

Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again

Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again

Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again Aging: Finding Joy in Your Life Again
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